I'm Depressed

Of course, I cannot be depressed.  I must be optimistic and lead the system in ever new and creative endeavors to improve our success.  I must raise the bar.  I must be a motivator to every employee.  I must see obstacles as opportunities.  I must keep the main thing the main thing.  I must lead the system in behalf of our community and our kids.  I know.

But just between you and me on this another STAAR test day, I am very worried about our profession.  Worried to the point of depression.

This is a profession!  Teaching kids and supporting those who do is a professional practice.  We all must at least have a college degree, pass tests to be certified, multiple hours of professional development, annual appraisals and performance evaluations.  To lead campuses and districts we must at least have a master's degree and more certification tests as well as more professional development.  We are licensed to practice as professional educators.  I am proud of that, and proud of my licenses and degrees.  I am proud of my experience over about 40 years and all that I have learned and observed and read and studied and practiced. 

And yet, as I sit here our legislature is in session.  They are talking about high stakes standardized tests, teacher evaluations, graduation requirements, charter schools, vouchers, curriculum evaluation, and school funding.  These discussions are being led by a radio talk show host and lawyers, none of whom have any credentials to make educational decisions at all.  They are assigning a ton of responsibility to the Commissioner of Education who is also a lawyer with no educational background.  I am stupefied, not stupid.

If I wanted to improve public education, should I have become a lawyer, a rancher, a talk show host?  Is that the key?  Have I made a fundamental error in my career path by pursuing learning, degrees and certifications in the field of education rather than simply running for office?  It appears I have less voice in the operation of my school system than non-educators who show up in Austin once every two years and posture politically at the expense of this profession.  Perhaps it would not upset me so if they listened to the professional educators, but they do not.  They have been to mountain top and have descended with strategies to improve our schools, that are carved in stone, and grounded in the notion that we must be more accountable, do more with less, shift public dollars from public schools to experimental privately run schools, and follow more and more non-research based strategies that are undermining our basic purpose:  teach kids.  The stone tablets in their hands are not subject to debate or modification; they are political gospel (sorry to mix my sacred metaphors) and they do not work.  I sit and await the adjournment of these wise folks in Austin who evidently know better than I what our school system needs to do to better serve kids.  I cannot even have a cigarette after I learn what they have done.  This then, is my pre-mandate blues.  I suspect once they adjourn, I shall shift from depression to anger.

But, I cannot tell you that.  I cannot say that this depresses me, or that I am likely to be very angry when they adjourn.  I am to smile.  I am to implement what those wizards in Austin have mandated.  I am to lead you to the places they have defined using standards they have divined with probably fewer resources.  So, please do not tell anyone I am depressed.  That runs contrary to my job description.

Thanks for letting me share.  I feel better already.