Nightmare

I awake in a cold sweat.  Panicky.  I am the President of the United States and something is terribly wrong.  I pursued this position because I believe in America and I believed I could make it better.  But that is not what is happening.

Did I really say professional athletes should be fired for protesting?  Did I really say that there are some good people in the White Supremacist groups?  Did I really say my inaugural crowd was bigger than Obama’s?  Did I really promise to hire the best people but hire unqualified family members and friends who function out of loyalty to me rather than loyalty to the nation, and have I really lost 22 of those appointees through resignation and firings, more than any other President in history?  Do I really have the lowest Presidential support rating in the history of the Presidency?  Have I really failed to implement Congressional approved sanctions against Russia?  Have I really bragged about grabbing women by their genitals?  Have I really made fun of a disabled reporter?  Have I really attacked individual members of the press, actors, and members of Congress?  Did I really have an affair and pay to cover it up?  Are there really 17 women who have filed sexual assault charges against me?  Did I really support a tax plan that helps CEOs and the very wealthy?  Have I failed to release my tax returns?  Am I really backsliding on my promise to not touch Social Security and Medicare and Medicaid?  Have I offended our British, German, French, Canadian and NATO allies?  Am I going forward with plans to build a wall?  Have I really requested a military parade in my own honor?  Have I really slapped tariffs on steel and aluminum?  Have I really played golf for over 100 days in my first year as President?  Have 19 people been indicted on charges arising from my campaign, and have 4 of them already pled guilty?  Have I sided more with the NRA than those who support gun control legislation?  Have I failed to generate as many jobs in my first year as Obama did in his last year?  Have I dramatically contributed to the National Debt after Obama was shrinking it?  Have I really undone a host of environment protections to allow the fossil fuel industry and producers in general greater leeway?  Are there really over 2,000 documented lies that I have uttered?  Have professors of political science already dubbed me the worst President in US history?  Has a panel of psychologists and psychiatrists already taken a stand that I am mentally unstable? 

If I am honest with myself, if I truly want to serve all the American people, if I truly believe in our form of government, if I truly value honesty and integrity above self-service, there is but one course of action open to me.  I must resign.  But if my motives are pure self-serving I will not leave this office without a fight.

I would resign and beg the American people for forgiveness.  He won’t.

What a nightmare.