Lies

 During Trump’s 4 year term as POTUS, he told a remarkable 30,573 lies.  Wow.  His followers believed most of them.  And after being soundly defeated in the 2020 Presidential election the man continues to spread false and misleading statements.  Most amazing to me, he seems to avoid any and all consequences for those lies.

One of the lasting legacies of the Trump Presidency is the acceptance of lies and the telling of lies without consequences.  Seems to me that if Trump can get away with it, and we are a nation where everyone is created equally, then I should be able to get away with telling a few lies I would love to spread.  Without consequences, of course.  Here goes:

Mitch McConnell is outed as a female cross-dresser.

Greg Abbott’s daughter was raped by a Republican and is now pregnant.

Lauren Bobert’s nude photos of her using an AK 47 as a sex toy are leaked online.

Marjorie Taylor Green is outed as a trans female.

Rand Paul dies of Covid after refusing vaccinations.

Josh Hawley is gay.

Susan Collins diagnosed with Aboulomania

Steve Bannon’s shrine to Adolph Hitler was discovered in his closet.

Charges against Matt Gaetz were dropped when it is revealed he does not have a penis.

Proud Boys discovered to be a gay men’s club

The Koch brothers admit their name is pronounced: “cock.”

Ted Cruz failed his citizenship test and is now an undocumented immigrant from Cuba

Manchin reveals huge monetary support from RNC

Kyrsten Sinema caught in bed with Joni Ernst

Jim Jordan ambushed by white men with AK 47s

The rapture occurs leaving all evangelicals here.

Donald Trump’s DNA reveals he is an albino African American.

 

That was fun.  Open to more ideas:

The Big Guy Returns

The big guy returned from his sabbatical in the year of the earth 4,543,292,022.  (Earthlings referred to this same year as 2022 which he found quaint.)  He had been very busy creating new stars, new galaxies, new planets, new life forms, and new laws of physics when he grew bored and decided to check in on earth, one of his first efforts to populate the universe with sentient beings.  Frankly, he was shocked by what he found. 

Humans were mucking it up.  Given the gift of sentient life, it appeared that some humans who could not use their big-guy-given brains were propelling the planet toward extinction.  Sentient yes, sapient no.  Time to intervene.  He hated to do this, but he had done it before with a great flood, a parting of seas, walls at Jericho, Egyptian babies, etc., and even the creation of his de-facto self on the planet did not seem to have worked.  Some humans just did not get it.  Giving up their sapience for oblivious self-service, greed, and fear was reversing one of his most creative life forms to obliviousness and unconsciousness.  No, it was not time to wipe them all out again.  But yes, it was time for a wake-up call. 

After careful thought regarding what options would likely work best, he settled on a series of miracles that would happen simultaneously throughout the planet.  Perhaps a swift change in reality would awaken the selfish, squabbling idiots.

The ground rules would remain the same with just a few minor twists.  Love your neighbor as you love yourself.  (Who is your neighbor?  Every human, you dim wit.)  And, do to others what you would have them do to you.  The new twist would be, have done to you what you have done to others.  This should be enough to get them thinking, he thought.  When to implement his plan?  Should the implementation be sudden and universal, or one human at a time?  He chose sudden, universal, and without warning.  No prophets this time.  No one listened to them anyway.

He chose September 22 as the implementation day.  This was the fall equinox, and what better day to promote equality and universal love than a day when sunshine and darkness were exactly equal.  On that day the following will happen:

Every white person who harbored bigotry and fear of other people based on their race and/or skin color will awake to discover that their skin had turned fire engine red.  Other humans who were born in various shades of beige and brown found them laughable.  The newly colored humans will be totally freaked out and have nowhere to turn for help and no way to hide their new color.  Non-bigoted white people who fought for equality and justice and the end of discrimination remained “white.”  The KKK immediately disbanded, as did other supremacist and hate groups.

Every person who supported building barriers along national lines to keep people out will awake to find themselves outside those barriers.  Every person who supported building barriers to keep people in will find themselves stuck inside those barriers unable to leave.

Every person who believed that sexual identity and sexual preferences other than binary heterosexuality was a defect and not worthy of love or protection will awake to be anything other than binary heterosexual.  They will awake either homosexual, transsexual, pansexual, etc., and subject to the discriminatory laws regarding such groups.

Every person with accumulated wealth equal to or over $1 million (the global top 1%) will awake to find themselves penniless and homeless unless their efforts had been sincere to improve the status of living for those less fortunate.  Preachers were not eligible for this exception.  Evidence qualifying for exception included support of programs that fed the hungry, clothed the naked, educated everyone, and healed the sick.  To escape poverty each of these newly poor people will work three separate jobs at minimum wage.  Most of them will likely be bright red anyway.

Every male who opposed abortion will awaken with his sex organs exchanged for female sex organs.  Every woman who opposed abortion will awaken with male sex organs that would never become flaccid.  Every time an anti-abortion male wants to have sex he will have to find another willing male. Each coupling will result in a pregnancy for the anti-abortion male.  Every time an anti-abortion female wants to have sex she will have to find a willing pro-choice female to participate and each coupling will result in pregnancy for the pro-choice female, likely ending the possibility of sexual activity for anti-abortion females, which will likely not be much of a change. 

Every person who believed and voted as though their nation was better off in 1950 will suddenly and completely lose all advancements that have occurred since that time. Cell phones, TVs, microwaves, air travel, modern medicine, polio and other vaccines, automobiles built since 1950, dentistry and medicinal pain medication, internet, computers, air conditioning, etc.  These backward-thinking people will be forced to live the rest of their lives as though it was 1950.  Most of them will likely be bright red.

Every elected official who had consciously, malevolently, and selfishly lied to his or her public will awake to find their genitals and their noses had anatomically swapped places.  It would be obvious now who was a dick and who was a pussy, and those very politicians would have to actually smell their own crap.  All Trump judicial appointees will likely start wearing masks, as will Trump, McConnell, Cruz, Abbott, and the vast majority of conservative politicians.

Every male who supported unlimited weapon ownership and use will lose their genitals altogether.  The big guy figured that those males didn’t have much to lose anyway if they felt the need to have weapons to feel safe while around their neighbors.  Women who support unlimited weapon ownership will not lose their genitals, but their sex drive would increase even though they were likely now paired with a eunuch.

The leader of any nation-state who used his or her position to increase his or her wealth or used his or her position to attempt to increase the land mass of their nation, or used his or her position to decrease the liberties of other humans will lose both arms and both legs and be at the mercy of good-hearted anti-war, pro-liberty people.  These leaders will be powerless.  They could not go anywhere without assistance, eat without assistance, even go to the bathroom without assistance, etc. 

The combined impact of all these new rules would result in a large population of bright red people with their genitals all messed up or gone, their wealth all gone, and for some their arms and legs.  The world will turn to those who retained their original skin color, retained their genitals, retained the location of their genitals, and retained whatever financial comforts they enjoyed to serve as leaders and model humans.  Everyone converted by this implementation would be told that it was the big guy who ordained the changes and they better get right with the ground rules before his next visit.

The big guy left and the world changed.

The rules are simple:  Love your neighbor as you love yourself, and do to others what you would have others do to you.  No exceptions.  “Neighbors” and “others” include all human beings, all races, all ethnicities, and all sexual preferences.   Simple. 

Humans cannot have it both ways:  One cannot claim to love the big guy and not follow his rules.   

Nothing Supreme About Supremacists

The arrest of 31 members of the Patriot Front, a white supremacist group, before a Pride Rally in Idaho, (Idaho?) inspired me to attempt to understand where such foolishness arises.  The entire event is confusing to me as it appears not only are they anti any race other than Anglo from Europe, but they are also anti any people with different sexual preferences.  I cannot determine if they are just ignorant or hateful.  Perhaps both.

Just a few random facts reveal the foolishness of their position.  White Europeans invaded the Americas where millions of indigenous people already lived.  Carrying disease and superior weaponry the European Anglos killed over 2,000,000 native Americans, took their land, ignored their culture, refused to honor treaties, and marched them into reservations, aka, internment camps.  Why celebrate one of the most massive instances of genocide ever recorded?  If we want to return the US to its native people that’s one thing.  Attempting to return it to the invaders and overlords is another.  No grounds for such a move. 

Worse, now that many of the remaining indigenous people in this hemisphere are attempting to migrate to the US it is the very like-minded group that attempted to exterminate them in the first place that is blocking their return.  If the “patriots” truly propose a return of control to the settlers of this nation they should be promoting our native Americans and the Hispanic migrants.  But, that is not the case.

Meanwhile, it was the same white Europeans who imported black people from Africa.  This was not a migration from one continent to another.  This was kidnapping based on the obscene notion that anything that promotes profit is good; human rights can be denied if they conflict with profit.  Do you think the Patriots get that?  I don’t. 

Funny if one thinks about it in context.  Black people here had no choice in the matter.  White people here had no choice in the matter.  It is not as though white supremacists did a better job of picking their parents than anyone else.  It is just luck that genetically made them white folks.  The same is true for every person and every shade of pigment on the planet. 

There is nothing special about white supremacists.  They did nothing to earn their “whiteness.”  It was luck of the draw.  To claim another human being is inferior because of the degree and shade of pigment in their skin is ludicrous.  That makes as much sense to me as believing white horses are superior to brown horses.  They are both horses!

One of the themes I continue to see in conservative conversations is the theme of blame.  When things are not going their way there is always someone else at fault.  One wonders if any of these folks will ever stand up and say we have been wrong and now we will attempt to make it right.  Another theme is the consistent proposals for simple solutions to highly complex problems.  Immigration problems?  Build a wall.  Growing population diversity?  Deport non-Anglos.  Democrats winning elections? Make voting harder for Democrats and accuse them of fraud even if there is none. But, for other problems do not dare ask the government to help solve the problem.  Ha.

One might argue that anyone who judges people or fears people or hates people based on skin color is likely less bright than others.  The same would be true about judging people based on their sexual preference and sexual identity.  Or on their religious belief.  But people who practice those kinds of decisions may possess a “stupid gene” we have yet to identify.  And only in that way are the supremacists different than the rest of us. 

Someone may want to point out to these folks that Jesus was not a white person and, therefore, is subject to the same discrimination they advocate.  And while we’re at it, someone should point out that Jesus was also a Jew since the Patriot Front is antisemitic as well. Someone may want to point out that real patriots adhere to the notions embedded by our founding fathers including the notion that all men are created equal.  For this group to claim patriotism is like those guys in the bar who want to convince someone they were a Navy Seal when they most certainly were not. 

Pathetic.  Misinformed.  Bigots.  Perhaps dangerous.  But surely not “supreme” in any way they have earned.  They are neither patriots nor at the front.  They are more like the Fascist Butt than the Patriot Front.

If Vulcans Ruled

Great passions and tremendous pain abound in our nation after the mass shooting of children and teachers in Uvalde.  Such passion, so many thoughts, and prayers, and so much pain has occurred after each of the 213 mass shootings this year.  And after the 693 such events in 2021, and the 611 in 2020, and on and on.  If I never loved I never would have cried.  (Paul Simon) 

I love Star Trek.  And, I love the Vulcans, Spock in particular.  Imagine a culture where emotions have been mastered and do not enter into decision-making.  Imagine a culture where logic, reasoning, and science are the basis of all decision-making.  Wow.  I wonder what we would be doing in the USA if we were all Vulcans.  Allow me to hypothesize.

If we start with our core principles our task is made simpler.  One of our dearest notions is that all men are created equal.  That does not mean all men are created the same.  That does not serve as an endorsement of intelligent design.  It is simply the language used in the latter part of the 18^th Century.  Such a statement has now been articulated and clarified.  When the word “men” was used in 1789, it meant everyone, regardless of race, ethnicity, gender, political beliefs, or sexual orientation.  It meant everyone.  If we were Vulcans and given this notion it becomes clear that people who practice, espouse, or secretly hide bigotry are un-American and are likely mentally ill.  There is no evidence that any one of the groups mentioned above is somehow superior or inferior to other groups.  People who hold such views should be referred to counselors and denied the opportunity to be a candidate for public office.

The second part of the core statement is that after we accept everyone is equal we also assume everyone has rights; civil liberties that are attached to each person and cannot be denied or taken away without due process of law.  The theme here is equal rights.  So, if men earn more money than women for the same job that is not equal.  If white males control in a nation where white males represent only 31% of the population that is not equal.  If we deny admission to people from some countries then we are not promoting equal rights.  If law enforcement defends and protects some people, but not all, we are denying equal rights.  If we have evidence we are denying jobs, education, or housing opportunities to people based on race, ethnicity, gender, or sexual orientation we are denying equal rights.  If we deny one gender the right to control their bodies but allow it for the other gender we are denying equal rights.  If we are denying rights and equality we are violating our core principles.  Again, folks who espouse or practice such behaviors are un-American and should be referred to counselors.

A third core principle is the separation of church and state.  Our founders knew all too well what happens when one religious belief is enforced by the government and other beliefs are thereby persecuted and discriminated against.  It is on that basis that churches are exempt from paying taxes on their revenue and their property.  However, once a religious group enters the political arena supporting one candidate over another, or one position on an issue over another, or seeking to have their beliefs enacted into law they have violated the core principle of separation of church and state.  Vulcans would immediately begin to tax those churches.

Further, any elected official who supports including a religious belief into law should be immediately removed from office and impeached.  Laws against abortion are based on the beliefs of religious groups.  Politicians who would take away a woman’s rights should be removed from office.  Politicians who ban books based on their religious perspective regarding sexual preference should be removed from office.  Politicians who attempt to re-write history based on their religious perspective should be removed from office.  Politicians who promote “putting God back in schools” or requiring children to pledge loyalty to a god should be immediately removed from office.  Why such un-American people are allowed to continue to serve as elected officials after they have sworn to protect and defend the US Constitution is illogical.  To be clear, religion, by its definition, is illogical.

The data is robust, and the science is clear:  where there are more guns there are more deaths by firearms.  When and where gun control becomes stricter the number of deaths by firearms decreases.  The US leads the world in deaths by firearm and in the relative ease of acquitting weapons.  Logic would dictate that the number of guns must be restricted, gun ownership must be monitored and the individuals seeking gun ownership should pass certification tests and be able to articulate the reason they need a gun.  Self-defense with no evidence of an attack is not a valid reason.  Fear is not a valid reason if the fear is irrational.  Living alone in the wilderness with predators is a justifiable fear.  Logically, the only people who say they oppose such regulations are the people who manufacture and sell guns as their income will decrease and the death of children does not mean as much to them as income.  The banter supplied by the gun lobby is ludicrous and illogical.  Only good guys with guns can stop bad guys with guns.  What a fallacy.  How does one detect a good guy vs a bad guy standing at the counter ready to purchase a gun?  We are all good guys and bad guys at some point in our lives so applying the logic of that statement means no one should have guns, or everyone should have guns.  Guns don’t kill people, people kill people.  That is misstated.  To be accurate and logical the statement could read, guns don’t kill people, people with guns kill people.  On and on, no motto justifies ignoring the data and ignoring the deaths other than the profit motive.  If one believes that the Second Amendment defends gun ownership one needs to take a course in constitutional law and American history.  Those who argue for unlimited gun ownership in the face of all the science and all the data could be labeled delusional and therefore not qualified to own a weapon.

We the people.  Of the people, by the people, for the people.  People rule in a democracy.  Corporations are not people.  The logical thing to do is to make corporate donations to political candidates illegal.  Likewise, PACs that exist to support one group over another should be illegal.  There should be a cap on the amount of money any one person can give to a candidate.  Our decision-making would start reflecting human interests, not corporate interests.

Climate change is real.  Global warming is real.  Logic dictates that if we want to continue to live on this planet (as though we have other options) we must immediately do all that we can to end the use of fossil fuels.  It will hurt, but it must be done, much as a leg with gangrene must be cut off, the oil industry and its subsidiaries must become illegal.  Cars must be electric.  Homes must use electricity, not gas.  Solar panels must be installed everywhere.  Wind turbines are installed everywhere.  Hot pursuit of fusion must occur.  Cruises must be canceled until a ship can demonstrate it is powered by something other than a polluting engine.  Same for airlines.  We must stop making plastic stuff.  We need to go through the industrial revolution again, this time with energy all coming from renewable sources.  Consumption of fossil fuels should be treated as an addiction to a controlled substance.  Help first, prison second.

We are a nation of laws, not of individuals.  Each individual must stand on equal footing before the law.  If a District Attorney, a Grand Jury, a Judge, or an arm of Congress issues a subpoena for documents and/or a person’s testimony, that evidence and that person must be delivered to the agent issuing the subpoena.  Arguing that some people are too important to abide by subpoenas undermines our democracy and our legal system. The punishment for failure to comply with a subpoena should be imprisonment.

Likewise, should the US House of Representatives pass articles of impeachment against a president, the Senate must conduct a trial, in public and before the nation.  To allow the Senate for purely political reasons to simply say no, we will not try this person, does not maintain the notion that we are a nation of laws, not individuals. 

Anyone who promotes the overthrow of our democracy, by law, has committed treason. Such folks should be tried as traitors whether they verbally encourage insurrection, or publicly deny the sanctity of the courts, the law, or the vote.

Those would be the first steps taken, I think, should we live in secular democracy governed by law, reason, science, and a constitution that defines how people will conduct such a government.  Spock would be proud.

Live long and prosper.

I Grieve. I Vote.

This is not new. It is hardly news. Since Charles Whitman climbed the Texas Tower in 1966 and killed 18 people we have had mass shootings at schools. In fact, there have been school shootings as far back as 1840. It is not new that conservatives claim rights defined in the 2nd Amendment as the basis of opposing gun control legislation. It is not new that flag-waving right-wingers warn against any attempt to restrict the purchase of weapons or identify red flags that might prohibit individuals identified as disturbed from obtaining firearms. The discourse between those horrified by the ease of weapon possession in this country and those who somehow think it is a sacred right has boiled down to logic vs. belief, individual freedom vs. community well-being, gun manufacturers, vs. grieving family and community members. It is not different from the vaccinated vs. the anti-vaxers. In this nation will we allow individuals to exhibit behaviors that are harmful, nay terminal, to the group? So far, the answer is “yes.” And our children are dying. Adults are dying. And we remain content with a misread rule from 1791 designed by Madison to arm citizens if needed, against a tyrannical government. So sad that the attempts at tyranny have come from pro-guns groups.

This is not new. But one wonders when it will be enough.

Can we tell the good guys from the bad guys? No. So the notion that the only way to stop a bad guy with a gun is a good guy with a gun is as nonsensical as saying the only way to stop someone with a gun is by someone else with a gun so give everyone a gun.

If guns are outlawed, only outlaws will have guns. Exactly. If heroin is outlawed only addicts and drug dealers will have heroin.

And here in Texas, we are going in the opposite direction. No license is needed to own or carry. Therefore, no surprise children are dying. If you are a gun-carrying conservative you should celebrate the deaths in Uvalde as it is an indicator of your freedom to carry a weapon rather than the freedom of the rest of us to live.

I grieve. I vote.

A New Raptura

The term “rapture” for evangelical and fundamentalist Christians is taken from ancient Latin “raptura” and means to be kidnapped, snatched away, or seized, a term very unlike modern associations of joy, and intense pleasure.  Nope, those who believe in the Biblical Rapture believe all previous believers will be called into the clouds to meet Jesus, then all current believers will be snatched away to join that group in the clouds.  The Bible does not mention the term rapture, but the current fundamentalist concept began to take hold in the late 1800s.

I have often thought of that event held dear in the hearts of some believers, as a horrible event.  2,000 years ago there were no automobiles, airliners, battleships, aircraft carriers, International Space Station, satellite operators, or even amusement park employees, so the snatching of believers might have left some sheep unguarded but would not likely cause much death and mayhem.  In the current high-tech society, the disappearance of a large number of people who are snatched away would result in multiple deaths and a huge amount of emotional pain.  So, if a loving God intends to do such a thing he does not seem very loving to me at all.

What further bothers me, assuming the perspective of a believer, is that those who are snatched are willing to be snatched, leaving family, friends, and loved ones behind.  How selfish is that?  Why not hang around and help?

The expression, “the only thing necessary for evil to triumph is for good men to do nothing.”  So, the long-range plan for humanity is to snatch up all the good men?  Duh.  That seems counterproductive.  Let’s leave all the nonbelievers, all the evildoers in charge while good folks consort in the clouds.

So, I propose a change in the way Christians view the rapture.  It should not be the seizure and elevation of believers but should be a casting down of the wicked.  God has done that before via the great flood, Sodom and Gomorrah, Pharaoh's army, etc., etc.  Why not at the end times?

If we believed that the day would come that all non-believers, all evildoers, all liars, all criminals, all those who grossly sinned against their fellow man by placing power and money above all else, should be cast down rather than all the good guys being sucked up.  Think of the ways we could improve the human condition!

Folks like Trump, McConnell, Greene, Boebert, McCarthy, Cruz, Abbott, Hawley, etc., etc. would be cast down and quickly disappear leaving the good solid people who understand the New Testament and the US Consitution in charge.  Then we would have the ability to establish heaven on earth where no one goes hungry, without shelter, in need of medical attention, or education, is shut out when seeking asylum, or belittles other humans because of race, ethnicity, gender, gender preference, or wealth.  Those who will say and do anything to achieve personal power would be the first to go, and I would say good riddance.

It may take a reverse rapture for the current supporters of the vile to realize they are on the wrong side and have been lied to and have had their fears and angers ignited by the accelerant of bigotry.  And, Biden could appoint 5 or 6 judges when the others disappear. 

Time for a new raptura. 

Closed Hearts, Closed Doors, Closed Minds

 As a former Methodist I was sad to hear that the Methodist Bishops have concluded there is no compromise available on the issue of non-heterosexual marriages and clergy so the church will split.  The conservative wing, those who will not support same-sex marriage and homosexual clergy, will establish a new Methodist Church known as the Global Methodists.  As I recover from my sadness I begin to laugh.  So much for the motto, “Open Hearts, Open Doors, Open Minds.”

In 1785 Methodists officially opposed slavery and called for emancipation.  Southern Methodists fought back and the church at first mollified its position, then reinforced the original position.  Members of the church who supported slavery, left the church.  In hindsight, it should be safe to say that bigotry drove the split.  Today is no different.  Those who not only do not recognize the existence of the LGBTQ community are splitting from a church that recognizes same-sex marriage and heterosexual clergy.  Geeze.  Some Methodists are slow learners and the new “global” church shall be scorned in years to come by those who continue to have imaginary friends.  For some, politics and religion are a sacrilegious mix worse than gays and straights.

(I would further suggest the moniker for the new churches should be "Provincial Methodists," as the term "global' implies a worldwide view and liberal thinking.)

As the new church begins its lobbying efforts to attract current Methodists to join them the issues will look like they are logistical:  what happens to church property?  What happens to established fund balances?  etc.  Moot as far as I am concerned.  The issue is bigotry versus love and acceptance as equals those humans who are different from the majority, the same issue present in discussions of racial bigotry.  Rejecting a person because of their race is the same process as rejecting someone because of their sexual preference. 

No doubt both sides will rail against the other side citing Bible verses and interpretations to sanctify their sanctimonious positions.  I find that equally laughable as the Bible is so full of conflicting statements that almost anyone can find a verse supporting their particular point of view.  I would simply point out that those who support inerrancy and the literal so-called truth of the Bible stand on shakey ground if they do not support stoning to death anyone who has premarital sex, anyone who commits adultery, anyone who gets a divorce, and anyone who disobeys their parents.  The 4,000year-old Bronze Age philosophy reflected in the Bible is simply not appropriate for the 21^st Century any more than the owner's manual for a Model T is useful for reference on a model Tesla.

It may not be immediately obvious, but I suspect this split will accelerate the growth of the fastest growing group in American religious categories:  The “None.”  As science advances, as fact replaces faith, in fact, faith only exists without facts, the number of people opting out of organized religion is escalating.  If facts confirmed Christianity everyone would be a Christian.  Or, if prayers were answered there would be no doctors.

Still, for mostly historical and sentimental reasons, I regret to see the split.  I have long held that there is no such thing as a conservative Christian and this split continues to prove my point.

Regardless of faith or lack thereof, I support Open Hears, Open Minds, and Open Doors.  Those who judge others by superficial characteristics and/or characteristics determined at birth, who would build walls against other people, who would exclude other people from a place at the table, and who would perceive that some humans are superior to others are not the people who will advance humanity in generations to come.  They represent roadblocks to improvement and to faith.